> >>Subject: Sardarji special the best of the best > >> > >>>hi friend > >just take some time off to read this; its really one of the good ones...!! > >>> > >>> > >>>Croc boots > >>> > >>>Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me > >>>a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and > >>>disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him > >>>hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one . He > >>>walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims > >>>"71st and *again* barefeet!" > >>> > >>> > >>>The 4th Child > >>> > >>>Sardarji got the 4th child. He fills data in the birth certificate > >>> > >>>"Mother: Sikh. Father: Sikh. Kid: Chinese." > >>>"How come you write "Chinese" when both parents are > >>>Sikh?" > >>>"Aah, Sardarji read a newspaper, it says that every 4th > >>>person born on the Earth now is a Chinese." > >>> > >>> > >>>Surd Collection > >>> > >>>There was a competition. Those who don't laugh for 100 > >>>continuous jokes will get an award. Our surdarji gang > >>>headed by Bantu singh went to competition but > >>>unfortunately only one of them got the admission. So Bantu > >>>as representing the surdarjis went and sat with other > >>>competitors. > >>> > >>>People started telling jokes one by one. Our sardarji didn't > >>>laugh a bit though somany others got dis-qualified. Rest of > >>>the surdarajis were so happy after 98th joke thinking that > >>>they will get their share of prize since Bantu was sent as > >>>their representative. But after 99th joke, Bantu started > >>>laughing, rolling on ground, no body could control him. His > >>>surd friends got angry and asked "are saale why didn't you > >>>hold your laugh for just another joke", > >>> > >>>Bantu replied " Are yaar, main kya karooon, woh joke > >>>number 1 was too good " > >>> > >>> > >>>Sardar & Honda > >>> > >>>One day there was a Bihari going in a Fiat Car at > >>>45KMPH on a high way and enjoying his drive. > >>> > >>>Suddenly a Sardaji came Booiiiiiiiiinnnnnnn on a Honda and > >>>peeped into the car and shouted at the Bihari - ' Kabhi > >>>honda chalaya kya?' and sped off, The Bihari was surprised > >>>but he did not bother. > >>> > >>>After some time the Sardarji came Booiiiinnnnnnnnnnn... in > >>>the opposite direction, peeped into the car and shouted > >>>again ' kabhi honda chalaya kya?' and sped off , This time > >>>the Bihari was annoyed , since the sardar was teasing > >>>about his driving. > >>> > >>>After some time again the Sardar came back speeding and > >>>said the same thing peeping into the car . The Bihari was > >>>about to say something but the Sardar sped off. This time > >>>the Bihari increased his speed but suddenly stopped as he > >>>found the Sardar lying on the road, bleeding. > >>> > >>>He got down and mocked at the sardar ' Kyon Sardarji , > >>>Kabhi Honda chalaye kya?' > >>> > >>>The sardar said ' Wohi to puch raha tha , Mein Brakes ke > >>>liya doond raha tha' > >>> > >>> > >>> > >>> > >>> > >>>THE PROPOSAL > >>> > >>>A collegian was deeply in love with a pretty foreign girl, > >>>whom he wanted. But he did not have the courage to talk > >>>to her in person. So he decided to go alone and with the > >>>help of a dictionary, he wrote a letter of proposal to her. > >>> > >>>HE WROTE : > >>> > >>>Most worthy of your estimation after a long consideration > >>>and much mediation. I have a strong indication to become > >>>your relation. As to my educational qualification, it is no > >>>exaggeration or fabrication that I have passed my > >>>matriculation examination; no doubt without any hesitation > >>>and very little preparation. What do you say to the > >>>solemnisation of our marriage celebration according to the > >>>glorification of modern civilisation and with a view to the > >>>expansion of the population of present generation. > >>> > >>>On your approbation of the application, I shall make > >>>preparation to improve my situation, and if such obligation is > >>>worthy of consideration it will be our argumentation of the > >>>joy and exaltation of our joint dissimilation. > >>> > >>>Thanking you in anticipation and with devotion, > >>> > >>>To remain victim of your fascination. > >>> > >>>SHE WROTE : > >>> > >>>Dear Mr. Victim of my fascination, > >>> > >>>Congratulation for your lengthy narration of course full of > >>>affection aimed at an affiliation for a combination which on > >>>examination I find is a fine presentation of your ambition. > >>> > >>>You have passed your matriculation with little preparation, > >>>what about my graduation after a long botheration, so > >>>improve situation in education and make an application by > >>>acquisition of post graduation and minimum qualification for > >>>the convocation and before taking your photo for circulation > >>>under go beautification. > >>> > >>>Further strict observation of the following conditions is the > >>>regulation for the determination of our relation. > >>> > >>>1. Consultation of my parents before approaching for my > >>>connection. > >>> > >>>2. Communication of your confirmation that you are not a > >>>victim of any fascination and, > >>> > >>>3. Procreation must not be your recreation. > >>> > >>>In anticipation of a solid action instead of continuation of > >>>paper conversation. > >>> > >>>I Remain, > >>> > >>>Unaffected by your affection. > >>> > >>> > >>> > >>>NEW JOKES > >>> > >>> > >>> > >>> > >>>All U funny jokers out there, I need your help! Please send > >>> me some jokes!!! > >>> > >>> > >>> New Desi Jokes! > >>> > >>> > >>>This is is a letter from a sardarji mother to her son at school > >>>.... > >>> > >>>Pyaarey Puttar, > >>> > >>>Vahe Guru. I am writing this letter slow because I know > >>>you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you > >>>left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most > >>>accidents happen 20 miles from your home, so we moved! I > >>>won't be able to give you the address as the last sardar who > >>>stayed in this house took the numbers with them for their > >>>next house, so they wouldnt have to change their address. > >>> > >>>This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. > >>>I'm not sure it works too well, last week I put in three shirts > >>>and pulled the chain and I HAVE NOT SEEN THEM > >>>SINCE. > >>> > >>>THE weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last > >>>week. The first it rained for three days and the second time > >>>for four days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your > >>>aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail > >>>with all the buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the > >>>pocket. > >>> > >>>We got another bill from the funeral home. It said that if we > >>>don't make the last payment on GRANDMA'S FUNERAL, > >>>she will come up again. Your father has another job. He > >>>has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass in the > >>>cemetery. Your sister had a baby this morning, I havent > >>>found out whether it is a boy or girl, so I don't know > >>>whether you are an aunt or uncle! > >>> > >>>Your uncle jatindar fell into a whiskey vat. Some men tried > >>>to pull him out, but he fought them off and drowned. We > >>>cremated him and he burned for 3 days. > >>> > >>>Three of your friends went off the bridge in a pick-up > >>>truck. One was driving and the other two were in the back. > >>>the driver got out, he rolled down the window and swam to > >>>safety. the other 2 friends drowned because they couldn't > >>>get the gate down. > >>> > >>>there isn't much more news at this time. nothing much has > >>>happened. > >>> > >>>love, mom > >>> > >>>p.s. i was going to send you some money, but the envelope > >>>was already sealed. > >>> > >>> > >>> > >>> > >>>The Truth Will Set You Free > >>> > >>> At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that > >>> most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and > >>> that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by > >>> saying, "I know the whole truth." > >>> > >>> Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. He > >>> goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, > >>> "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him > >>> $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father." > >>> > >>> Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home > >>> from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole > >>> truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, > >>> "Please don't say a word to your mother." > >>> > >>> Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next > >>> day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy > >>> greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." > >>> > >>> The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, > >>> and says, "Then come give your real father a big hug." > >>> > >>>God created the mule, and told him, "You are mule. You > >>> will work constantly from dusk to dawn, carrying heavy > >>> loads on your back. You will eat grass and lack > >>> intelligence. You will live for 35 years." > >>> > >>> The mule answered, "To live like this for 35 years is > >>> too much. Please, give me no more than 20." > >>> > >>> And it was so. > >>> > >>> Then God created the dog, and told him, "You are dog. > >>> You will hold vigilance over the dwellings of Man, to > >>> whom you will be his greatest companion. You will eat > >>> his table scraps and live for 30 years." > >>> > >>> The dog responded, "Lord, to live 30 years as a dog > >>> like that is too much. Please, no more than 10 years." > >>> > >>> And it was so. > >>> > >>> God then created the monkey, and told him, "You are > >>> monkey. You shall swing from tree to tree, acting like > >>> an idiot. You will be funny, and you shall live for 20 > >>> years." > >>> > >>> The monkey responded, "Lord, to live 20 years as the > >>> clown of the world is too much. Please, Lord, give me > >>> no than 10 years." > >>> > >>> And it was so. > >>> > >>> Finally, God created Man and told him, "You are Man, > >>> the only rational Being that walks the earth. You will > >>> use your intelligence to have mastery over the > >>> creatures of the world. You will dominate the earth and > >>> live for 20 years." > >>> > >>> The man responded, "Lord, to be Man for only 20 years > >>> is too little. Please, Lord; give me the 15 years the > >>> mule refused, the 20 years the dog refused, and the 10 > >>> years the monkey rejected." > >>> > >>> And so God made Man to live 20 years as a man, then > >>> marry and live 15 years like a mule working and > >>> carrying heavy loads on his back. Then, he is to have > >>> children and live 20 years as a dog, guarding his house > >>> and eating the leftovers after they empty the pantry; > >>> then, in his old age, to live 10 years as a monkey, > >>> acting like an idiot to amuse his grandchildren. And it is so... > >>>Aditya Kar Original Message sent by Anand Aggarwal --------------------------------- Do You Yahoo!? Yahoo! Mail - Free email you can access from anywhere! ---------------------------------- > >>Subject: Sardarji special the best of the best
> >>
> >>>hi friend
> >just take some time off to read this; its really one of the good
ones...!!
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>Croc boots
> >>>
> >>>Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me
> >>>a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and
> >>>disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him
> >>>hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one . He
> >>>walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims
> >>>"71st and *again* barefeet!"
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>The 4th Child
> >>>
> >>>Sardarji got the 4th child. He fills data in the birth certificate
> >>>
> >>>"Mother: Sikh. Father: Sikh. Kid: Chinese."
> >>>"How come you write "Chinese" when both parents are
> >>>Sikh?"
> >>>"Aah, Sardarji read a newspaper, it says that every 4th
> >>>person born on the Earth now is a Chinese."
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>Surd Collection
> >>>
> >>>There was a competition. Those who don't laugh for 100
> >>>continuous jokes will get an award. Our surdarji gang
> >>>headed by Bantu singh went to competition but
> >>>unfortunately only one of them got the admission. So Bantu
> >>>as representing the surdarjis went and sat with other
> >>>competitors.
> >>>
> >>>People started telling jokes one by one. Our sardarji didn't
> >>>laugh a bit though somany others got dis-qualified. Rest of
> >>>the surdarajis were so happy after 98th joke thinking that
> >>>they will get their share of prize since Bantu was sent as
> >>>their representative. But after 99th joke, Bantu started
> >>>laughing, rolling on ground, no body could control him. His
> >>>surd friends got angry and asked "are saale why didn't you
> >>>hold your laugh for just another joke",
> >>>
> >>>Bantu replied " Are yaar, main kya karooon, woh joke
> >>>number 1 was too good "
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>Sardar & Honda
> >>>
> >>>One day there was a Bihari going in a Fiat Car at
> >>>45KMPH on a high way and enjoying his drive.
> >>>
> >>>Suddenly a Sardaji came Booiiiiiiiiinnnnnnn on a Honda and
> >>>peeped into the car and shouted at the Bihari - ' Kabhi
> >>>honda chalaya kya?' and sped off, The Bihari was surprised
> >>>but he did not bother.
> >>>
> >>>After some time the Sardarji came Booiiiinnnnnnnnnnn... in
> >>>the opposite direction, peeped into the car and shouted
> >>>again ' kabhi honda chalaya kya?' and sped off , This time
> >>>the Bihari was annoyed , since the sardar was teasing
> >>>about his driving.
> >>>
> >>>After some time again the Sardar came back speeding and
> >>>said the same thing peeping into the car . The Bihari was
> >>>about to say something but the Sardar sped off. This time
> >>>the Bihari increased his speed but suddenly stopped as he
> >>>found the Sardar lying on the road, bleeding.
> >>>
> >>>He got down and mocked at the sardar ' Kyon Sardarji ,
> >>>Kabhi Honda chalaye kya?'
> >>>
> >>>The sardar said ' Wohi to puch raha tha , Mein Brakes ke
> >>>liya doond raha tha'
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>THE PROPOSAL
> >>>
> >>>A collegian was deeply in love with a pretty foreign girl,
> >>>whom he wanted. But he did not have the courage to talk
> >>>to her in person. So he decided to go alone and with the
> >>>help of a dictionary, he wrote a letter of proposal to her.
> >>>
> >>>HE WROTE :
> >>>
> >>>Most worthy of your estimation after a long consideration
> >>>and much mediation. I have a strong indication to become
> >>>your relation. As to my educational qualification, it is no
> >>>exaggeration or fabrication that I have passed my
> >>>matriculation examination; no doubt without any hesitation
> >>>and very little preparation. What do you say to the
> >>>solemnisation of our marriage celebration according to the
> >>>glorification of modern civilisation and with a view to the
> >>>expansion of the population of present generation.
> >>>
> >>>On your approbation of the application, I shall make
> >>>preparation to improve my situation, and if such obligation is
> >>>worthy of consideration it will be our argumentation of the
> >>>joy and exaltation of our joint dissimilation.
> >>>
> >>>Thanking you in anticipation and with devotion,
> >>>
> >>>To remain victim of your fascination.
> >>>
> >>>SHE WROTE :
> >>>
> >>>Dear Mr. Victim of my fascination,
> >>>
> >>>Congratulation for your lengthy narration of course full of
> >>>affection aimed at an affiliation for a combination which on
> >>>examination I find is a fine presentation of your ambition.
> >>>
> >>>You have passed your matriculation with little preparation,
> >>>what about my graduation after a long botheration, so
> >>>improve situation in education and make an application by
> >>>acquisition of post graduation and minimum qualification for
> >>>the convocation and before taking your photo for circulation
> >>>under go beautification.
> >>>
> >>>Further strict observation of the following conditions is the
> >>>regulation for the determination of our relation.
> >>>
> >>>1. Consultation of my parents before approaching for my
> >>>connection.
> >>>
> >>>2. Communication of your confirmation that you are not a
> >>>victim of any fascination and,
> >>>
> >>>3. Procreation must not be your recreation.
> >>>
> >>>In anticipation of a solid action instead of continuation of
> >>>paper conversation.
> >>>
> >>>I Remain,
> >>>
> >>>Unaffected by your affection.
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>NEW JOKES
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>All U funny jokers out there, I need your help! Please send
> >>> me some jokes!!!
> >>>
> >>>
> >>> New Desi Jokes!
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>This is is a letter from a sardarji mother to her son at school
> >>>....
> >>>
> >>>Pyaarey Puttar,
> >>>
> >>>Vahe Guru. I am writing this letter slow because I know
> >>>you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you
> >>>left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most
> >>>accidents happen 20 miles from your home, so we moved! I
> >>>won't be able to give you the address as the last sardar who
> >>>stayed in this house took the numbers with them for their
> >>>next house, so they wouldnt have to change their address.
> >>>
> >>>This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine.
> >>>I'm not sure it works too well, last week I put in three shirts
> >>>and pulled the chain and I HAVE NOT SEEN THEM
> >>>SINCE.
> >>>
> >>>THE weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last
> >>>week. The first it rained for three days and the second time
> >>>for four days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your
> >>>aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail
> >>>with all the buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the
> >>>pocket.
> >>>
> >>>We got another bill from the funeral home. It said that if we
> >>>don't make the last payment on GRANDMA'S FUNERAL,
> >>>she will come up again. Your father has another job. He
> >>>has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass in the
> >>>cemetery. Your sister had a baby this morning, I havent
> >>>found out whether it is a boy or girl, so I don't know
> >>>whether you are an aunt or uncle!
> >>>
> >>>Your uncle jatindar fell into a whiskey vat. Some men tried
> >>>to pull him out, but he fought them off and drowned. We
> >>>cremated him and he burned for 3 days.
> >>>
> >>>Three of your friends went off the bridge in a pick-up
> >>>truck. One was driving and the other two were in the back.
> >>>the driver got out, he rolled down the window and swam to
> >>>safety. the other 2 friends drowned because they couldn't
> >>>get the gate down.
> >>>
> >>>there isn't much more news at this time. nothing much has
> >>>happened.
> >>>
> >>>love, mom
> >>>
> >>>p.s. i was going to send you some money, but the envelope
> >>>was already sealed.
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>The Truth Will Set You Free
> >>>
> >>> At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that
> >>> most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and
> >>> that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by
> >>> saying, "I know the whole truth."
> >>>
> >>> Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. He
> >>> goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says,
> >>> "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him
> >>> $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father."
> >>>
> >>> Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home
> >>> from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole
> >>> truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says,
> >>> "Please don't say a word to your mother."
> >>>
> >>> Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next
> >>> day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy
> >>> greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth."
> >>>
> >>> The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms,
> >>> and says, "Then come give your real father a big hug."
> >>>
> >>>God created the mule, and told him, "You are mule. You
> >>> will work constantly from dusk to dawn, carrying heavy
> >>> loads on your back. You will eat grass and lack
> >>> intelligence. You will live for 35 years."
> >>>
> >>> The mule answered, "To live like this for 35 years is
> >>> too much. Please, give me no more than 20."
> >>>
> >>> And it was so.
> >>>
> >>> Then God created the dog, and told him, "You are dog.
> >>> You will hold vigilance over the dwellings of Man, to
> >>> whom you will be his greatest companion. You will eat
> >>> his table scraps and live for 30 years."
> >>>
> >>> The dog responded, "Lord, to live 30 years as a dog
> >>> like that is too much. Please, no more than 10 years."
> >>>
> >>> And it was so.
> >>>
> >>> God then created the monkey, and told him, "You are
> >>> monkey. You shall swing from tree to tree, acting like
> >>> an idiot. You will be funny, and you shall live for 20
> >>> years."
> >>>
> >>> The monkey responded, "Lord, to live 20 years as the
> >>> clown of the world is too much. Please, Lord, give me
> >>> no than 10 years."
> >>>
> >>> And it was so.
> >>>
> >>> Finally, God created Man and told him, "You are Man,
> >>> the only rational Being that walks the earth. You will
> >>> use your intelligence to have mastery over the
> >>> creatures of the world. You will dominate the earth and
> >>> live for 20 years."
> >>>
> >>> The man responded, "Lord, to be Man for only 20 years
> >>> is too little. Please, Lord; give me the 15 years the
> >>> mule refused, the 20 years the dog refused, and the 10
> >>> years the monkey rejected."
> >>>
> >>> And so God made Man to live 20 years as a man, then
> >>> marry and live 15 years like a mule working and
> >>> carrying heavy loads on his back. Then, he is to have
> >>> children and live 20 years as a dog, guarding his house
> >>> and eating the leftovers after they empty the pantry;
> >>> then, in his old age, to live 10 years as a monkey,
> >>> acting like an idiot to amuse his grandchildren. |
